week ahead

hey everyone!

i'm exhausted, but that's ok. i'm used to getting a lot accomplished on weekends, but i guess i'm going to have to get used to not having it my way all the time aren't i? :)

i did get to hang out with my family, my husband, and my husband's family though, and i consider that to be a wonderful use of that time.

i don't know if you're like me, but i have a hard time not being superwoman every day. i want to cross like forty-five things off my list at a time, and i try, i really try.

but most of the time i fail (at that) and i think i'm realizing that i probably should change my personal expectations. i have five jobs and therefore, i work all the time.

i posted an excerpt from Kristin Hannah's description of her days as a writer. i want that so much it hurts. i don't need an ocean every day. i think i would get tired of a vacation if i lived in one. but i would love to have less 'due' all the time. i'm always hurrying to get something completed, turned in. i'm spread so thin (my fault) that if anything in my life jumps in, which it always does, i am instantly behind. so i stay up late and do work until around one or two, crawl into bed, unable to wind down. then i'm completely tired the next morning. and it starts all over again.

i'm complaining, and that's awful of me. my life is really not that bad at all. i'm actually very happy, even with all my deadlines due. it's just my perfectionism creeping in and telling me i'm not being as productive as i'd like, therefore, i'm no good.

do you ever do that? i find that i have a hard time finding a balance. that i'm bored when i'm not busy, but i'm freaked out when i'm too busy. my dad says i do my best work this way...frazzled. and i supposed he's right. but it's hard :)

i am doing some of my best work right now, so i should probably just shut up...and get back to my work.

and so i will.

peace out.

ahr